Do It For The Plot

Do it for the plot? Wtf does that really mean?

I’ve seen it on all over the Pinterest and Etsy boards, but until life completely went to shit for me, I had no clue the depths of this phrase or what it really meant to live out. Fast forward to 2025, if you ask me today, it’s the phrase that signifies what it actually meant to start living life BOLDLY – without a plan in sight!

For as long as I can remember, I have been a Type A perfectionist, trying to micromanage every aspect of my life to fit the standards I set for myself. I can vividly remember making to-do lists and yearly goals in my diary as early as the third grade. Insane, I know. I believed that if I did everything “right,” God would cosign my plans and let me glide along my chosen journey without any hardships.

Spoiler alert: I was wrong—wrong AF.

It wasn’t until the end of my undergraduate years that I realized life doesn’t work that way, especially not with God. My college experience was nothing like Whitley Gilbert’s HBCU life in A Different World, and that realization hit hard. Still, I fought to maintain the illusion of control.

That changed during my first semester of grad school when I found out my father had Pulmonary Fibrosis, a condition with an average life expectancy of two to five years. That moment shattered everything. Disappointment, confusion, sadness, and anger crashed down on me all at once. Why wasn’t God cooperating with my plans? I had done everything “right,” and my goals weren’t even unreasonable.

I only wanted good grades, a stable career that paid well but still left time for family and friends, marriage by 25 or 26, and kids by 28. A five-bedroom house with a pool or lake access. His and hers Mercedes in the driveway. I even planned for the matching sorority and fraternity tags. (Take a wild guess at the fraternity—lol.) A golf cart. A dog. Country club membership for family days on the weekend. By 30, everything would be checked off the list.

Silly me.

That life-altering moment triggered a breakthrough I didn’t even know I needed. I can still picture the day I found out, sitting in my Anatomy class, struggling to focus. My mind spiraling as I tried to piece together timelines. How was I going to balance grad school while maximizing the limited time I had with my dad? How did this fit into my plans?

We all know our loved ones won’t live forever, but somehow, we always think we have more time than we actually do. I remember my roommate at the time saying, “Dang, the least you could do was acknowledge I came into class.” I hadn’t even realized it. Looking back, I can only imagine how distant and confusing my behavior must have seemed.

I was drowning, but no one knew because I didn’t know how to say anything. I hold grace for that version of myself. I was doing the best I could at the time. But I’m also sincerely apologetic to the people I pushed away. There never seemed to be a “right time” to go back and clear up misunderstandings from that season of my life. Maybe this post will serve as that bridge. Maybe not. Maybe it doesn’t even matter anymore. But for what it’s worth, I’m open to those conversations.

Then came the anger.

I was already frustrated with God because my plans were becoming harder to achieve than I expected. But this? This took things to a new level. I couldn’t understand how God could watch one of his Christian daughters do something as rare as saving herself for marriage in an attempt to be obedient to his word and, yet take away the chance for her father to walk her down the aisle when he knew how much that meant to me. It felt like a slap in the face.

I was pissed. I was heartbroken.

Things got much harder before they got better. That’s an understatement actually. But after working through grief, mental health, spirituality, relationships, self-esteem, and career challenges eventually, things did improve.

In sum, Do It for the Plot means complete surrender for me. It’s about embracing the journey and patiently awaiting the finish line. In the end, if you have faith, you already know it will all work out. So why not collect fun stories and memories along the way?

I mean, don’t we all hate movies with no plot or climax? Why would we want our own life stories to be like that?

Boring.

Life is for living.

It’s always funny running into people I haven’t seen in a while. I can tell from their faces that they’re trying to piece things together-wondering how I disappeared, why I seem different but still the same all at once. Someone even asked if I’d gotten surgery or a BBL. It’s wild to think that’s even a possibility in some people’s minds, but to set the record straight-the answer is NO. Trust me, if I had, I would be taking Tia Kemp’s advice, and not working a 9-to-5! LOL. When you start to be truly at peace with who you are, I believe you show up in the world differently and the people that stop to pay attention can tell.

Along the way, l’ve had some of the craziest things happen. Like the time I said yes to happy hour after work and ended up bar-hopping all night-still in my scrubs. Or the time a “friend” tried to scam my cards for five thousand dollars but got caught on a Ring camera which I later exposed on IG. Or when I ended up on the side of the road in Tulum with police searching me at gunpoint (definitely flew a little too close to the sun on that one).

People who keep up with me always say, “Omg, you really could have a show.” “Have you ever thought about doing a podcast?” The short answer is yes, and one day, maybe that time will come. But for now, as I share my stories and thoughts through this blog, I hope we can create more socialization in these digital spaces-a community that fosters transparency, support, and friendship beyond the surface.

Please read, like, share, and comment. Maybe you’ll be inspired to share your own stories, spark new conversations with your friends, find some new friends, or take something that might be helpful along your journey. The possibilities are endless when you embrace the uncertainty of life.

So here’s to the journey!

Remember some of the best stories are still unwritten so live boldly, embrace the unexpected, and make sure your life story is worth the MF plot!